HEAL YOURSELF: sketches of self-discovery.

I am seated here thinking, and the truth is I don’t honestly enjoy thinking all because it easily creeps in the worry I so don’t much desire. I am supposed to be a bubble of life and fountain of unending joy, or so does the world expect me to be. Away from their expectations however is who I truly am and this as it is, is that I work every day at who I am.


I make sure that I allow and absorb only the energy I desire and for me, every negative surge is repelled as soon as it peeps through. Just like worry tries to set in. I am all but forced to pick something else to work on and refocus my mind to. That way, it is easy to channel my energy and purpose towards prospects that build rather than crash me.


This my dear treader is the solution I have had most times for when worry decides that this home seems cool for it. I have to face it head-on and let them know that this home they think they got is quite uninhabitable and conditions herein are harsh and arid.


It may sound easy but truth be told, there is nothing easy about this because the more you work at it, the easier it is to get to the plateau of conformity. Just like I worked at meditation and without realising it I almost got used to it. I so easily found my mind distracted just as the journey towards a soft mellow meditation session set in and with this almost lost all my previous efforts at it.


So just as such, beating off worry at her onslaught may not be so much of an easy fete but just as James Clear will have it in his cryptic write through Atomic Habits, everything we would love to attain in life depends more on who we want to be as individuals and in essence the habits we build become who we are. So yes worry will always set in but you not wanting to be caught up in it will push you to be conscious all the time it sets in and lay standards to shove it off.


Of such moments of uncertainty, I have grown to learn through most painful experience that without caution does desperation so easily set in and with it the slump of depression. This, PePa is oh so sure that you too my dear treader ain’t no stranger to, right? And so to carelessly remind you of same helps shelve no such worries off your table, right? No, wrong as awareness as it is, is the very first and most important step towards freedom. If I am not misguided, they termed it as knowledge being the pathway to power, and what is true power if not freedom in totality? 


So yes, for me to find true freedom I must thus not allow these creeping vague realities to be the break and weak of me. This I hence can only achieve by allowing in true positivity despite all nether assurances of impending and unavoidable doom. By this I allow my mind to set course to all possibilities and in jest break off all avenues of a barrier…..


But, before setting course to all possibilities yet, why not take a moment and enjoy the fresh air that so effortlessly rushes into my nostrils and down my receptive lungs? Why not look to the cloudy skies that sure promise another strawberry penumbral eclipse? Oh, that already passed you Yester-evening, huh? Worry not, you still have the beauty of the full pure moon at hand devoid the eclipse and I heard, as they deem, that these full moons create not only a mark of beauty up in the starry skies but also sets the heart towards the hope of unbreaking light ahead.


Strawberry lunar penumbral eclipse courtesy of shatterstock images.


Midsky full moon 5th June 8.45pm

Well, in the meantime, allow me to make this long-overdue phone call and check on the honeymooning Dave, there are no honeymoons during this pandemic period so he should be able to pick up my call and confirm if he is okay. You on the other hand my dear treader can make a call to your friend, mum, sibling, or check on a neighbor and see if they are okay. 


What is life if we can’t share it? They call it love so heal yourself through being an asset to others. 



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